Observations from the road

When I was a little girl, I remember going to Las Vegas with my family. We were probably just passing through on our way somewhere else, but that is the only part I remember about that trip. I was dazzled.
The lights! All the flashing lights! The way the street looked like midday even when it was dark outside. The people everywhere. The warmth. The lively atmosphere.
I said to my dad, “When I grow up, I’m going to live here.” I remember him telling me that I would change my mind, but I was positive then. I was going to live in Vegas.

Today as we were driving home from California, the boys and I were playing travel Bingo. It’s a fun little road trip edition of Bingo that I picked up just before we left. It has pictures of various things you’ll find on a road trip, with a few strange items as well. Like, one of them was a profile of a dude and beneath it said, ‘mullet’. So, we’re driving past car after car looking for dudes sporting mullets, when The Fish says, “Mom kinda has a mullet.”
Well that’s just lovely. Car trips are hard on anyone’s appearance. Cut me a break.

Anyway, one of the items we were looking for in our Bingo game was a billboard. As we approached Las Vegas, I was sure we would see tons of them. And, sure enough, billboards-a-plenty. But geez! As soon as I noticed the….ahem…..type of billboards that we were encountering, I was all, “Boys! The billboard square is a freebie. Everyone cease looking at these billboard immediately! KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE BINGO CARDS BOYS!”
I’ve never seen so much scattered booty in a two-mile stretch of freeway in all my life. I don’t remember that part of Vegas from when I was a kid. Signs that were even making me blush. (me!) They said things like, “All Nude, All day!” or “Sin” spelled out with tangled female body parts.
Not to sound all old and stodgy, but, Vegas is just gross.