I didn’t have a hard time turning 30. It wasn’t a big deal at all. 35? No problem. It wasn’t until I was turning 38 that I started to think, Hey I don’t like where this is going.
But today. Today I am a 40 year old. Forty. FOR.TY.
Over the past couple of weeks I have been combating the doom of this upcoming day by making a list of ‘pro’s’ of being on this earth for 40 years. Looking over the list, I noticed that most of the list is made up of three things.
People. Experiences. Life lessons.
I have come to know so many amazing and interesting people in my life. This morning, my very thoughtful husband handed me a stack of envelopes which contained letters of love from friends and family. They wrote the sweetest things and told stories and memories that made me laugh and cry all at the same time. What a gift!
Sometimes, when my oldest, Josh is bored, he will come to me and say, “Tell me one of your stories, Mom.” And you know, I can always think of one to share. It seems that crazy things happen to me. I don’t know if I invite these experiences by my actions, but I’ve got some doozies. Some stories are sad, some are scary, some are inspiring, and some are just funny. I have quite a good collection though, in my forty years on earth. These memories are precious treasures to me.
Kelly asked me this morning if I like me better today or if I liked myself better ten years ago. My answer was that it is easier to be me now than it was then. I have learned so many lessons and bits of wisdom along the way that help me to have a calmer heart and a sense of peace. I won’t bore you with all the gory details, but it’s true that our trials bring such blessings. I really am happier now than ever before.
I think my problem about turning 40 was just that in my mind it was this older person that just sat around doing their taxes all day or wearing elastic waistband jeans. Or maybe it’s because it seems like time is going by so fast and I can’t wrap my head around the fact that I am nearly halfway done with my life.
My brother sent a Happy Birthday text to me this morning and he said, “Age is a state of mind.” I think he’s right. And after considering my list of pro’s and reading the wonderful letters from everyone I love, on this 14th day of June, 40 isn’t feeling so bad.